Birth Trauma Survivor and Maternal Health Advocate

“There was something in her eyes that made me trust her. Maybe it was because they held the same cynicism, the same world-weariness I saw in my own every morning when I looked at myself in the mirror.” Melika Dannese Lux, Corcitura

During our first meeting, Rachael told me that she was going to be my partner on this journey. She would reiterate that statement often during our sessions.  I used to think it was such an odd and corny thing to say. How can you be partners with someone you hardly know?  Plus, in order to…

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"Do not wait until the conditions are perfect to begin. Beginning makes the conditions perfect." Alan Cohen

I spent several months promoting my television show, “The Heart of Beauty”. It was a hectic and emotional time. The show received high praise yet continued to be rejected by networks. I persevered for Christine and her family to have a chance to tell their story to the world. I kept going for every person…

"Doctors have told me I have a high pain threshold, but I can only know what I feel. I think I'm good at minimizing the pain and being indifferent to it." Johnny Knoxville

Within thirteen months, I had  two hemorrhages. I was also living life as a happy mom shuffling Miss J back and forth to classes and play dates.  At the same time, my anxiety was at an all time high. I wasn’t depressed, I was afraid of dying. I was afraid that enjoying normal activities like…

“Debriefing-style counseling after a trauma often aggravates a victim's stress-related symptoms, for example, and 4 in 10 bereaved people do better without grief therapy.” Winifred Gallagher

I never found any comfort in talking to my psychiatrist, Dr. Jones–I was only seeing her twice a week because she suggested it. I dreaded every appointment. Instead of feeling like I was making progress, I often left feeling much worse than I did before. During our sessions I saw her eyes constantly dart back…

"I've never found therapy to be a sign of weakness; I've found the opposite to be true. The willingness to have a mirror held up to you definitely requires strength." Brooke Shields

The first time I sought therapy was shortly after my grandmother’s death–I was eighteen years old. It felt embarrassing and pathetic talking to a stranger about my feelings, but it was also relieving being able to unload on an objective outsider. I was a little amused by the fact that my experience in therapy was…

“And oh she had been broken. She hid it well, but Ross knew from personal experience that once you had put the pieces together, even though you might look intact, you were never quite the same as you'd been before the fall.” Jodi Picoult, Second Glance

Bobby and Miss J accompanied me to my first post partum doctors appointment–the last time I was there, I was thirty-six weeks pregnant. After thirty-six weeks, they tell you to be prepared because you can deliver at any time. Boy, was I ready! Towards the end of my pregnancy I indulged in any type of…